The Doctor is In

I was able to watch the pilot episode of Grey's Anatomy at Studio 23. I know a lot of people has already watched it, a couple of my friends have watched the whole season 1 and are already looking for copies of season 2. So I was really interested on seeing it last night. After the movie I wanted to be doctor. I was just sorry I let go of my dream of becoming a doctor. You see when I was small my ambition was to be a doctor. You know how adults ask children what they want to be when you grow up...my answer was to be a doctor. Or when I write in my classmate's slumbook under 'what's your ambition?'...my answer was to be a doctor. But between grade school and high school I just decided I didn't want to be a doctor. You wanna know why? Because I didn't want to marry at an old age hahaha! I think somehow I found out that it takes 10 years of studying to become a doctor so after doing some math here and there I thought I'd be too old when I become a doctor and then get married. My marrying age back then was 25...so that would mean I'm past my deadline ahehehe. Anyway, when I got into high school and it was time to get those college applications ready I wasn't decided on what course I should take for college. My mom told me to get a non-quota course so that I'll have a better chance of getting into UP. So I chose Journalism and Mathematics. I was writing for our high school paper back then thus my first choice and I was a bit good in math hence my second choice. I was also interested in taking Psychology but that was a quota course in UP so instead I chose that in my application at ADMU. Sobrang di related yung mga courses noh? I took the exams and prayed that whatever course I'll pass in then I'll take it as my future. I was waitlisted for Journalism in UP and they asked to pick another non-quota course so that leaves me with Math. I didn't want to take the risk and wait for a slot in Journ. I was also accepted at ADMU. My plans back then was if I finish Psych and still want to be a doctor then that would be a good pre-med course for me. Both UP and ADMU are good schools but since it's cheaper to study in UP than in ADMU, I went to study at UP. And I know I've made the right choice. I won't list down the things I love about my alma mater coz that calls for a separate post hehe.

After college I found myself going into the actuarial field. So there's go my concern about studying for too long because it takes a lot of studying to be an actuary. And I also gave up on that. Now, I'm just an ordinary employee...with no bright future ahead of me. Haaayy...

Basta after watching Grey's last night, I felt empty. Instead of a half full glass of water, I was a half empty glass. I dream of doing great things but I'm not sure if I'm capable of that. I always think that I'm an achiever, that I can do anything I put myself into. But once things get bigger I find myself backing down a bit. I think I'm afraid of the responsibility that comes with great achievements. I'm afraid that I won't be able to handle the responsibilities that comes with success.

With great power comes great responsibilities. - Uncle Ben, Spiderman