I hate him

I know hate is such a big word and I shouldn't be saying that. But after yesterday I can't help myself. I really shouldn't feel this way especially after I've been to confession just a few days ago. I should leave before I completely hate him. I love him but if we go on like this I might regret saying or doing some bad things. How can you leave somebody that you're stuck with? How can you leave somebody that you didn't even had a choice to be with at the very beginning? I know I'm such a lousy person for thinking this. I'm disappointed with myself for ever feeling this. And I'm so sorry.